Attachment is the great fabricator of illusions; reality can be attained only by
someone who is
detached
SIMONE WEIL


Sunday, November 14, 2010

The Eyes are Everywhere

It is safe to say that I am never going to be cut out to have domestic staff.

People are here today (as the first day) to clear out the garden. I will admit that the yard was horribly neglected and badly in need of doing. That someone else is willing to do it (for a small fee of course) is greatly appreciated. They are out there industriously pulling and cutting and mowing busy as little Pacific beavers, and I am sure that they are far too involved in their tasks to be paying any attention to me and yet somehow...

The paranoia of the mind is a fantastic thing. In the mind they cast judging eyes towards the house, tracking every move that is made within. Waiting, watching, laughing amongst themselves about the fools that cant even figure out how to pull weeds. Biding their time until they can seize a moment to enter the dwelling to steal belongings and take my life -

Okay, now that I've typed that out I realise that it is entirely possible that I watch far too many late night horror movies. That and I am obviously letting what I am writing get to me more than I had thought I was. Fictional characters are good like that.

I'm sure the gardeners are very nice people. They seemed friendly enough when they cut down the trees earlier in the year, but to be on the safe side perhaps I will endeavor to be out when they return tomorrow. I'm sure that there are errands that need doing, and if there is not - well writing alfresco couldn't hurt could it. In fact it might even help break the teeny tiny bit of block that seems to have crept in today. Tomorrow marks the half way mark of November after all. Luckily I am already past the halfway mark of the 50K goal, but I can feel my lead slipping away by the hour.

Well, perhaps not by the hour, that could be exaggerating a little bit. And contrary to what today's poorly formed words are spelling out, I am not an obsessive paranoid weirdo.

Weird yes, weirdo no.

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