Success

I did it. I reached the NaNoWriMo goal of 50,000 words in a month - well a little under a month any way. Over 50,000 words in 25 days. And while I knew going into the process that reaching the goal would be an achievement, I was unprepared for just how... amazing I would feel.

The shear wave of... unadulterated joy. The confidence boost of knowing know that yes, I can do it; yes I am capable of achieving something. When surrounding myself with so much rejection and so much failure, the notion that I am capable of a success - however it might seem to others. It warms me.There are those that don't understand - of course there are - but that is fine. Just because there is no real physical 'prize', the knowledge that I can - that this writing thing is doable - that is worth more than any amount of money or swag.

And that attitude, that sense of accomplishment surprises me.

I am, by nature, not one to diminish or ignore the material aspects of life. I like the tangible I wont deny it. But this seems more somehow. This is something that I have done, I have created with my own two hands. Maybe that is why my feelings of success are so great.

But the ultimately the whys don't matter. I am going to relish in the feeling, use it to propel me even further forward and drive me in my future goals.

Because there will be future goals. Now that I have found this process of working toward aims I am unwilling to let it go. Perhaps I should have listened to all those teachers that tried to ram goal setting down out throats in high school...